Rest in Peace Euston Mayer

Several weeks ago I was blessed to witness a gentle, thoughtful act of love that was heart warming and still brings tears to my eyes. It was a true reminder of what "family" really means. 

The oldest son of an ailing father physically lifted his wheelchair-bound father off of a porch, with the help of his nephew, so he could push his dad around the yard of his childhood .... So he could share a beautiful day with the man who taught him how to be a man. His father was dying of cancer, couldn't walk, and barely had the strength to hold up his head, so the son held it up for him. 

This man was once a strong, mountain of a man who worked on the railroad. He could fix anything, teach anyone anything, and he loved fiercely. He raised three boys and guided them into manhood as a man's man, with a gentle touch. He always had time for his boys, and supported their dreams no matter how unconventional they may have been. He was always their biggest fan. 

These "boys" are now men in their 60's and they took amazing care of their father in the wake of their mother's death. They spared his dignity while taking care of his needs. Their respect and reverence for this man never wavered and this weekend, they will lay him to rest. 

He worked hard, loved well and leaves an amazing legacy. Eight grandchildren and one great grandchild will all gather with the three "boys" to celebrate his life with laughter mixed with tears. They will hug and share stories, and they will love each other as he taught them. They will embrace and surround his big sister, who is 90 years old, and the last of her generation. They will model the love of Christ, as they have all along.

I am blessed to know them, and blessed to have been part of caring for Euston Mayer in the last months of his life. I wish I had know him longer, but I feel I know him well, because the character of his sons tells me all I need to know about the man he was.

Rest is peace, Mr. Mayer. It was an honor.

The Next Chapter

Lord, please lead their hearts in Your way, as they carry Your name!

Four ½ years ago, my then 19 year old son, Jake, called me to get some advise about a school project. He was in a PR class and needed to interview someone in the “real” world who was involved in some sort of PR or marketing campaign. He wanted to know if it was too brazen to select someone who worked for an organization he wanted to work for as well. As a career counselor, who knows the value of “who you know,” I strongly encouraged him to take advantage of this opportunity and do so with gusto!

Although a bit timidly, he did contact this individual and arranged to meet him at a coffee shop in Spartanburg. They had a great conversation, Jake got an “A” on the project, and, until yesterday, has been working with the organization ever since.

The organization in question was NewSpring church and the young man Jake interviewed that day was Shea Watts. Shea not only served as a subject for the school project, he subsequently invited Jake to be part of the Worship Team at the Spartanburg campus, where he served for two years. Eventually he was asked to serve on the teams that launched the Boiling Springs and Lexington Campuses, and finally to serve as a keyboardist at the Columbia campus. Jake and his wife Jessica, who served on staff at both the Lexington and Columbia campuses, have made lifelong friends through their association with the church, and they have been mentored and loved. In addition, they have been given the opportunity to grow professionally and personally, and they have certainly gained a greater understanding of working in full time ministry.

The pictures you see on this page were taken Sunday, August 21, 2016, on Jake’s last day with the church. He and Jessica are now answering the call to begin ministry with The Summit Church in the Raleigh/Durham area and will be moving away from me (sad mama), but towards their future (happy mama) … in 10 short days!!!  I will miss them, but I could not be happier for them as they take this next step.

As I sat in the auditorium of the Columbia campus on Sunday, watching Jake on stage, I was overcome with gratitude for the opportunity he was afforded 4 years ago. I am so grateful to a great God who saw fit to answer my prayers, that began when he was still in my womb, that others would come along side him when I was no longer his main influence ... to love, encourage, guide, teach and to lift him up. I was overwhelmed as I sat with his wife, Jessica, an amazing godly young woman, knowing that we both love him so deeply, and that he will be in her amazing hands for this next chapter, and beyond.

I know I will always be his Mom, and I know our calls and texts will continue, but this time, unlike the drop off at college 6 years ago, he’s entering the next chapter as a man, not as a boy becoming one.

We have weathered 24 years of life together, and he has become for me what I was for him all those years – an anchor, a confidant, a strong hand to hold, and a friend. As a mother, I could not be prouder, and more excited to see where this next chapter leads them. But, as a mother, I am struggling to not cry every time my mind’s eye pictures me driving away from their house in Durham next weekend, knowing that this time it’s different. This time it’s permanent.

But, as I captured this picture of Jake's hands on the big screen Sunday, God saw fit to be sure I saw the lyrics that where projected at that very moment. "I know God will not be shaken," and I know He is clearly leading them. So, as I close this, I will offer a prayer for them, as I try to see the screen through me tears!

"God bless them and keep them, place a hedge of protection around them, and keep them wrapped in Your loving arms. May they find Your strength when they struggle, and see Your face in the joy ... and, by the way, Lord, bring them home to Lexington, at least occasionally :) 

What If We Could Stop Time?

As I write this, I am sitting in a hotel room in New Orleans, feeling compelled to share how amazing God's timing is, if we are willing to believe His is better than ours. By nature, I am in a hurry and I approach most things with a sense of urgency that is not always necessary. I tend to think getting more done, and getting it done quickly, means I am successful and fulfilled. At this point in my life, after some rather dramatic life changes, and certainly after blowing past the age of 50, I am rethinking that perspective.

Yesterday, I spent the day with two amazing women here in the Big Easy. These women also tend to move quickly and decisively. But, alas, we ate a leisurely brunch and spent 4 hours discussing, not doing, and it was one of the most fulfilling days I've had in awhile. I listened to an old friend, really listened, and deepened a friendship with someone I hadn't seen in 10 years. We "did" nothing but talk, listen, learn and plan. And, maybe, just maybe, we allowed God to speak to us in the quiet space we created.

The last 5 years of my life have been interesting, to say the least. Lots of change, lots of stress, lots of introspection. Some days have been joyful, some stressful, and some downright painful. But, I suspect, everyone on the planet can say the same at various times in their lives. I think what matters is what we do with all of that once we come out the backside of a "life" storm. For me, having now come out the backside, yesterday was a reminder that now, at this point, I should be still, quiet, open and brave.

So what compels us to move instead of sit, to talk instead of listen? Why must we measure the success of the day with tasks completed? At what point do we start measuring the success of a conversation or the validity of an idea that could have impact on others, and their ability to converse and listen? Would that make a difference? I mean, would really listening to others, connecting heart to heart, eye to eye, enrich our lives and theirs?

I suspect the answer is a clear "yes" for most people, but I also suspect that the pace of our lives, and our society, makes us believe that "doing" is more important than stillness and conversation. I, however, am feeling very compelled to be deliberate in an effort to shift, at least slightly, down a gear - to listen more, to talk less, to truly see others where they are and seek information about what they need. I hope to measure my future days based on these metrics instead of those that have guided me for many years. I pray that God will continue to show me more of the value of His daily timing, not just His chronological timing. I want to stop time, or at least stop caring about it, as Jesus did. I want to take the time to connect as He did when on this earth, and as He wants to now.

The picture you see here was taken by a very special guy, last week on Lake Murray, in Lexington, SC. What you see behind me is a killer thunderstorm that did drop serious rain on parts of the area. What you also see are several beautiful breaks in the storm that allowed light to create a breathtaking shimmer on the water, even as the waters churned.

I believe we are to be that light for others in the midst of their storms, through genuine connection and conversation. I  believe that heart to heart, and eye to eye, we can "stop time" and embrace God's pace in an effort to truly connect. I pray I can practice what I am preaching here, and do that in my life. I pray the same for you.